The dreaded day

Sunday, January 29, 2012 is a sad day for me as a new mother. This is the day that I have dreaded since giving birth 7 weeks ago. The day that I go back to work and have to leave my little angel for the first time. Over the past week, I have cried and mentally prepared myself for this day. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but it was harder than I ever thought it would be. As a mom, my biggest fear is that Kenadie will feel like I have left her or don’t care about her, when that in fact is farthest from the truth. I want her to always know that I am here for her and ALWAYS will be and will never stop loving her for as long as I live. I just want to be the perfect mom, which I know is impossible, no one is perfect and I will screw up and hopefully learn from my mistakes. I want to be the parent who raises my children, but in this world with the cost of living just increasing, I have to work and rely on “It takes a Village” to help raise my child. The good news is that I am truly blessed with a wonderful family. Kenadie will spend time with Erik and my mother on the days that I have to work. Who better could I ever ask for, her father and grandmother. There is no doubt that she will be in the best hands possible, people that love her more than life itself. Last night, I got everything packed up and ready for the next day. I went to bed at 8:30p.m. and Erik was wonderful and stayed up with Kenadie to feed her and to put her to sleep for me while I got some much needed sleep. Kenadie finally went down around 11p.m. and slept until 3:45a.m. My alarm was set to go off at 4:15a.m. it worked out perfectly. I fed her and got ready for work and was ready to head out the door @ 5:15a.m. This was the time that I was trying to prepare myself for. The first time to leave my baby. I shed a couple of tears as I held her tight and hugged and kissed her. I handed her over to Erik and told her to be a good girl and enjoy having Daddy time today. It was hard, very hard, but I managed to keep quite calm. The best thing was knowing that she was safe in Daddy’s arms and that he would NEVER let anything happen to her under his care, so I was able to go to work knowing that she would be ok. Now, I just can’t wait for the 10 hour day to go by as fast as possible so I can see my Kenadie. The best thing is as I am typing this, Erik surprised me and brought Kenadie up here to see me. I have the best husband ever!