When someone says they don't want kids means they want to maintain the freedom to do things, which often times they never do. They say they want to travel, but never leave their state. They say they want to be able to date and sleep with anyone on a whim, when they usually just cry while they masturbate while Flogging Molly plays in the background. They want to bar hop till two in the morning, when they usually end up just staying home as their friends now have kids and don't have time or money to go out.
Now some have legitimate concerns, like they cynically look at the planet and think it's not a good environment for kids, which is something that's hard to argue, because it's subjective. Yet our parents decided to spawn children with the looming threat of nuclear annihilation hanging over them. Some say they can't afford kids, but that really means they don't want to give up their simple luxuries.
You know what? I'm ok with you not having kids. Whatever reason you don't want to slip out crotch fruit is a legitimate one. Really, it's cool. Don't spawn. The big difference between me of yesteryear and you is that I never felt the need to exclaim how dedicated I was to not reproducing when I was never asked my thoughts on the matter. Well maybe I have, but this is my blog and I'm going with the fact that I was the poster child of social graces. Yes parenting is hard, time and money consuming, and can cause stress between you and the person you decided to breed with, but those moments when you look down at your baby cradled in their mother's arms, and they look back at her with a smile, makes all the effort worth it.
So yeah, continue with your unsolicited lecturing masked as holier than thou preaching about how parents are throwing their life away. I've lead both lives, and I'm secure in my choices, as you should be.
"Every cliche about kids is true; they grow up so quickly, you blink and they're gone, and you have to spend the time with them now. But that's a joy." - Liam Neeson
I don't think kids are expensive when you look at your annual net expense. I think kids are simply "expense replacements" as your nights of going out buying overpriced drinks are replaced with diaper buying trips. The joy of debating Star Wars with your 3 year old signficantly outpaces any additional expenses.
ReplyDeleteThen again, mine are not in college.
As a childless woman, I take exception to your generalizations. My choice not to have children was based on the fact that the relationship I was in was not healthy enough for children--it was abusive. Yes, I have a career, and yes, I love children, but God didn't grant me the joy of having a child when I did get out of that relationship and felt ready, so I am childless. The assumption that childless people are selfish is really no better than assuming that parents have babies because a child will love you when nobody else will and society rewards you greatly for procreation. People don't have children for lots of reasons, and people have children for lots of reasons--most of which are selfish. Just don't generalize because you really don't know. Most of the time we aren't even honest about our own reasons. Of course you love your kid--but don't act like all parents are selfless and kind and giving, because I've seen way to many who are anything but.
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