Kenadie's first Halloween

Wednesday was Kenadie's first Halloween. It's not a big deal to most, as Halloweens come and go and she's too little to really enjoy the wonder that is dressing up and begging people for candy. The wife agreed that I get to choose one costumer for our baby, the last I'll ever have a say in, so Princess Leia it was.

When I got home that afternoon Kelly had the photography studio set up and was clicking pictures of the little one. Below are a couple:

She actually seemed to enjoy the costume, at least for a while. We arrived at my brother in-law's and met with friends and family to hand out candy to the multitudes of kids who came from far and wide to collect candy in his neighborhood. It was a warm evening so we sat in camping chairs as kids climbed up the stairs and showed off their costumes.

Some kids were a lot of fun, as they hammed it up in their attire. One kid gave us a his best Spider-Man pose, and other declared their awesomeness while dressed as the Avengers.

Overall, it was a fun night, but we couldn't stay long as having little ones don't allot staying up late. So we packed up the car and went home and put her to bed.

I'm looking forward to finally taking her by the hand and walking her from house to house. Maybe I'll implement a Halloween tax, like my dad did, and take ten percent of her candy. Then again, I don't need to eat candy

"There is nothing funny about Halloween. This sarcastic festival reflects, rather, an infernal demand for revenge by children on the adult world." - Jean Baudrillard

Alone with Kenadie

Last night the wife went on a much needed girls night out with some friends for wine and Mexican grub while I was in charge of the wee one. So the wife came home from a meeting that afternoon, brought out all the items I may need, and wished me luck. Kenadie was asleep, but of course she woke up almost right after Kelly left.

First it was time to feed, a joyous moment that is normally handled by the wife, but it was my turn to spoon feed Kenadie. My daughter is not a patient eater by any means, and if you're not immediately inserting food into her mouth while she's in the high chair she will let you and the rest of North America hear her displeasure at this. It was a messy affair, with her taking her bib and wiping food all over her face. Still it wasn't that bad and she laughed at me making weird sounds to keep her from fussing.

My mother recently informed me that when I was a baby I would scream with rage if I had any sort of hunger pain. Kelly now blames me for all of Kenadie's food tantrums.

Next up was some reading time, and her and I sat down, I plopped in a Baby Einstein DVD and put it on repeat play, a feature built into the disc (Disney knows what they're doing). I broke out a pop up book and started reading to Kenadie the adventures of Elmo competing in a race, when I heard the baby start grunting as if she was bench pressing a Fiat. Oh dear, she's become little Miss Poopie Pants.

The ritual of the diaper change was about to commence, and it does give me a sense of pride that I can change the nappies like the best of them. Ok maybe I'm not super nanny, but I have skills. I place her down and get her all ready. She had a tepid look, but with some silly noises and me doing my best Weird Al impression as I changed the lyrics of various songs to reference pooping, she laughed and got ready to get all clean. I was done wiping the nastiness off her when she let out a cackle, which in turn she her peed. Ye gods. I close up the once clean diaper as quick as humanly possible and let her do her thing. After another diaper change she was ready to hear more stories about Sesame Street characters doing Sesame Street things, such as visiting the desert and going to a carnival.

I put her in her jumper and she played a bit while she watched her Baby Einstein DVD, something she gets fixated on. After hearing that play over and over again I decided I wanted to commit genocide, but she was enjoying it so I suffered through.

I gave her her last bottle of the day, but it was my time to be Mr Poopie Pants. I figured the wife would be home soon, so I waited, but as the clock ticked it was apparent that if she didn't arrive soon it would be a mess of biblical proportions.

I put Kenadie in her excer-saucer and placed her outside the bathroom door, but had it cracked open enough that I could keep an eye on her. It was surreal sitting their doing my business as she just stared at me with a blank expression. I felt awful having her witness the terrible event of her dad crapping in the toilet, but she wouldn't remember it in a few hours, but she may recall it in regression therapy years down the road, before she decides to have her name changed.

After more playing with the toy piano, more reading and more of the DVD, that was produced by Satan, it was getting time for bed. Another diaper change took place, and of course she peed as I was doing it. She was an exhausted one, but it was the first time I ever put her to sleep for the night by myself. See putting Kenadie down for the night is an art. It takes the skills of a brain surgeon and the patience of Gandhi. I make my way up the stairs, gently put her in the crib, and turn on the various devices such as noise maker and monitor. Right as she was cuddled looking peaceful in slumber my dog decided to bark at invisible ninjas and woke Kenadie up. She decided she wanted nothing to do with this sleep business.

I picked her back up, turned off the fan, noise maker, and monitor, and took her downstairs. After a few minutes of being cradled in the rocker, and listening to that miserable DVD, she was sound asleep again. I took her back upstairs, placed her in the crib, turned on the necessary equipment, and left her to slumber.

I went back downstairs and sat down in my chair, picked up a book, and started to ponder my time watching her solo. I really don't understand how in the hell single parents manage. I know I can be a good father, but I wonder if it's only because I have my wife to help, otherwise I'd be as incompetent as Congress is at managing the country.

"Children wish fathers looked but with their eyes; fathers that children with their judgment looked; and either may be wrong." - William Shakespeare

Four months

Four months ago the wife and I welcomed our first baby into our lives and little Kenadie took her first breath. I've written at length the emotions and adrenaline surrounding that fateful day, and really, I don't have the skills as a writer to truly express all of what was going on in my head and in my heart. Our little bundle came to us and we couldn't be happier. Remember your first love in high school, when you swore you would never love anyone more than your sweetheart, but then you meet your spouse, and you promised them that no one will take up more of your heart than them, and suddenly you're faced with a little baby in your arms, and you suddenly know the meaning of love and sacrifice.

Having a baby is not all wine and roses. It's hard work, it demands you function 100% on very little sleep, can strain your marriage, and you see your bank account dwindle to next to nothing, but as they say, nothing good comes easy. Yes the work is worth it, and I don't have to keep telling that to myself to keep me sane. It's those little moments that make it so much fun, as Kenadie lies on my chest and fights sleep and she gives her glowing smile when you're making silly noises. There's no substitute for a healthy, happy little one. Nothing can match it.

And now, as she fusses and poops and demands attention I find myself happy to give it to her. She's my daughter, and everything is about her.

"Anything I've done up till May 27th 1999 was kind of an illusion, existing without living. My daughter, the birth of my daughter, gave me life." - Johnny Depp

There's No Place Like Home...

April 3, 2012 was a scary day for North Texas.  What started out as a normal day turned into a nightmare for some.  My alarm went off @ 4:30a.m. as usual.  I got up, got ready for work and headed into the office.  Erik took Kenadie by to my mom's house and he headed into work @ 7a.m. All is going swell until it starts to get dark outside and we hear that some severe weather is approaching the DFW metroplex.  We think of it as a normal spring storm that may or may not have some hail and it will all be over in 30 mins.  I call my mom to tell her to keep an eye on the weather just in case something severe may happen.  All of a sudden, the alarms at work went off and the man over the PA announced that we all need to take cover in the designated tornado safe areas.  We all went into the conference room away from any glass windows.  We all sit, wait and wonder.  I was a nervous wreck as we are watching online as the tornadoes hit Arlington, Lancaster, and were headed towards my mother's house.  My baby girl was with her and I was more worried about them than myself.  I just felt helpless that I couldn't be there with her in case something bad happens.  I knew though that if Erik and I couldn't be with her, she was in the best hands possible.  I call my mom and she has Kenadie in her car seat drinking a bottle with the crib mattress over their heads in the closet.  I was giving her a play by play of what was happening.  There were reports of tractor trailers being thrown 100ft in the air like toy Tonka Trucks.  It was scary.  The man on the PA system came back on and told us "We are now clear to return to our work areas".  We all asked, now or not?  The alarms were still going off, so we weren't sure.  They repeated it several times and finally we went back to our desks.  About 30 mins later, the alarms went off again, and we went into the conference room.  The second storm was coming in our direction.  We waited it out until the storm passed and then returned to our desks and went home.  I was so happy to pick up my little angel and know that she was safe from mother nature's wrath.  I get home and Erik and I look at the news and hear that another town, Forney was hit pretty hard.  I know a lot of people who live in Forney.  The day after, they reported between 12-15 tornadoes developed yesterday and so far no deaths were reported.  Lots of Angels were watching over DFW yesterday.  This could have ended up a lot worse than it did.  As I crawled into bed last night I said a prayer for all the people that lots their homes.  It really makes you realize what is important in life and to treasure each day that you are alive on this earth and to treasure the people you have in your life.  I love my family and friends, I am glad we are all ok. 

Link below is footage of the trailers:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X1FfI0p4u9Q&feature=related



Democracy

Democracy, or at least the Texan flavor of it, was in full effect last night as I attended a school board meeting regarding the rezoning of our neighborhood. I entered by my lonesome and took a seat, but saw many fill in, so much so that the school board members brought out extra chairs as it soon became standing room only. Residents from my neighborhood showed up in the dozens to voice their concerns about their kids possibly going to a less than reputable high school, and there was another community facing the same issue.

 What got me is that if you wanted to speak, you were required to show up at 5:30, fill out a speaker's card, hang around for an hour while the board meets in private, then have your chance to voice your concerns. I missed my chance to express my views through interpretive dance, but alas there were many others willing to step up to the plate for the community. Passion was abound as many showed respect to the board, but made their pleas to have their children go to an exemplary high school.

After hearing a lot of Indian men speak in broken accents, some middle school kids took to the mic and did the needful. Upset that their middle schools are closely integrated with the high school, they were not pleased to be told they'd be going somewhere else. One kid even noted to the board that at the beginning of the meeting we made the pledge of allegiance, but if his choice was taken away, the board was taken away our liberties. A round of applause ensued.

After the board heard all of what they allotted to hear, they later discussed the issue with a planner, and it was apparent that even if our community wins this round, this issue may come up again next year, and the next, and the next. It was apparent, to me at least, that this was an issue that wasn't worth fighting for, as the only choice I could make was move my family into a better area that's not threatened with zoning issues.

It sucks as a big part of the reason we moved into Castle Hills North was because of the schools, but now that it's apparent the school district could give two shits about the premiums we pay to them through our taxes and educational fund, it's best to cut our losses and move on. There are better home values offered in North Texas.

FOR SALE



As you all know, Erik and I decided in 2010 to build a beautiful home in Castle Hills North.  We were so excited, we were able to make it our own and pick out all the custom upgrades.  We love our home and were so excited to raise our family in it.  Last week on our neighborhood website, there was an ongoing forum regarding rezoning Castle Hills North to go to The Colony Schools.  Since we don't have school age children we weren't sent the notice in the mail like all the other residents who had children attending LISD schools.  Part of the reason why we chose Castle Hills North was because our kids would go to Hebron High School, which is Exemplary.  The Colony High School is not.  Now, we are not at all happy about this and now want to move.  Our children's education is most important to us and we want the best for them and The Colony High School is not what we want.  No offense to The Colony HS, but I have been in that school many of times working with my Step fathers business.  There are lots of kids that wear their pants down to their knees and lots of violence occurs at this school.  I refuse for Kenadie to bring home one of those boys one day.  I know we have lots of time until Kenadie reaches High School, but we pay top dollar in property taxes to live in this elite neighborhood.  All the cities around us are cheaper, we would much rather live in another neighborhood and not pay the high property taxes for a home in a neighborhood where we can't get our children the proper education that we see fit.  Now, we have taken the big step while the market is still good for buying and have put that For Sale sign in our front yard.  The neighborhood is still wonderful and we will miss our home dearly, but it isn't for us anymore.  Let's hope we have luck in selling. 

Date night

It's been a couple of months since Kenadie was born, and the wife and I have done little if anything for ourselves. I try to get a few moments of gaming and watching movies in ten minute increments in, but I haven't really spent any quality time with the wife other than watching bad sitcoms and taking care of the wee one at some unholy hour.

It was time to indulge ourselves, and indulge we did. We went to a premier steak house and ordered accordingly, along with some real crab cake that wasn't fried. It was a mountain of crab in some lobster sauce. We partook in the best cheesecake I've ever had, light and fluffy, with butterscotch dripping off of it and flavored with pralines.

Watching my wife consume an alcoholic drink was a treat. This is a woman who hasn't really drank in almost a year, for obvious reasons, and she ordered an extra dirty vodka martini, straight up. She was buzzed about halfway through it. I drank the same, the first martini I've had in months, and it was a pleasure to revisit one of my favorite cocktails. Of course I had to order a bloody Caesar as well.

After consuming what seemed like seventeen thousand calories, we still would've done it again in a heartbeat as it was one of the best, if not the best, meals we've ever had. As much fun as we had having some time to ourselves, we couldn't help but miss Kenadie. We were only gone for a couple of hours, but it seemed weird seeing an empty car base for her seat when we drove to pick her back up.

The wife and I went inside my mother in-law's to pick up the baby, only to find she slept through the entirety of our meal. We probably could've taken her after all, but it's a crap shoot as to whether she'll be hungry or not. It may not have been a good idea considering all the smells in that joint might have made her hungry, and she's opposed to us eating a hot meal. Oh and she's a baby, so she poops a lot.

Even though the meal was excellent and the company even more so, I can't say I let myself enjoy a lot of it with Kenadie not being present. I guess this is parenthood.

"Being a father, well, I don't know if this is a change, but it makes me want to get out of here faster. Get off the clock. Just 'cause the baby is my reason for living, my reason for coming to work."  - Richard Dean Anderson

Challenge Accepted, Wife edition

As you all have seen, Erik posted a blog listing 52 reasons why he loves me.  Here are my 52 reasons why I love Erik.  We thought this would be a great way to have this documented for Kenadie to read one day about her parents. 


1. The way you smile at me when I sing and act goofy.

2. The way you take care of Kenadie

3. When you kiss me on my forehead

4. Your Cajun lasagna

5. Your love for star wars

6. How smart you are

7. How you will get me anything I want and not be bothered by it

8. I love how you love me even with all my faults

9. How sweet you are to the dogs

10. How great you are with my family

11. How you are so willing to go to the grocery store since I hate going

12. How you unload the dishwasher without being asked

13. The love I see in your eyes when you kiss Kenadie

14. How you can’t wait to have another baby

15. The fact that you are so good at writing

16. You are so sweet

17. You care about me so much

18. The fact that I can trust you completely

19. The fact that you will buy me endless bottles of water all while knowing that the water in the fridge is perfectly fine.

20. I love how you have started singing every commercial jingle with me

21. How you do the choo choo train with your arm..

22. How you share my love of food

23. How well we get along

24. You are sexy

25. You give great advice

26. You always do the right thing

27. You have an enormous heart

28. You know the lyrics to just about any song

29. You introduced peanut butter surprise to me

30. You still love me after having a baby

31. You listen to all my complaints

32. You still love me after watching my pregnant butt devour crab at the crab pot in Seattle

33. You speak “Kelly”

34. You have great hair

35. You work really hard to support our family

36. I love how you say “nose” and touch your nose to Kenadie’s

37. You are such a family man

38. I love how you watch tv with me and never complain

39. I love how we laugh with each other and sometimes at each other.

40. I love your love for good beer

41. I love that you show our love in front of others by telling me you love me in front of other people.

42. I love how you show me the utmost respect and respect for our relationship

43. You are so handsome

44. You are a true gentleman

45. You are a role model for other men and if we have a boy, he will want to be just like you.

46. I love how you love to cook

47. I love how you are always willing to try new things

48. How you keep me sane

49. How well you get along with my friends

50. Your love for movies and video games, but know when it is time to spend time with the family

51. Your never ending support

52. How you care for others and how you call me to always keep me in the loop



I love you babe!  Happy Valentine's Day!

Challenge accepted

My wife asked me yesterday if I could come up with 52 reasons why I love her. Of course I could, because I'm Erik and I can do anything. So here they are in no particular order:

1. The way she laughs at my jokes, no matter how corny they may be.
2. How she gives her half smile when I'm having a geek moment.
3. That she is the organizer in the house.
4. She always gives me the power of the remote.
5. Her casserole.
6. How good of a mother she is.
7. She gave me my daughter.
8. That she plans everything to the nine, and doesn't leave room for failure.
9. She bargain shops.
10. I don't have to always going shopping with her.
11. When we do shop together it's always fun.
12. She taught me how to make Frito pie.
13. Her values.
14. Her honesty.
15. She's sexy.
16. She's sexy even first thing in the morning.
17. Her loyalty to me, our daughter, her friends, and her family.
18. She taught me how to make perogies and sausage.
19. How she sings along with every silly commercial jingle.
20. How she takes such good care of our dogs.
21. How she let me be a part of the dog's life.
22. How she puts up with my skepticism.
23. She surprises me with Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
24. She brings me Dasani Lime at work.
25. How I love seeing her first thing in the morning.
26. How she's as big a fan of sushi as I am.
27. She never lets me forget the details of anything.
28. She works hard for the money, so hard for it honey.
29. She loves me even at times when I don't deserve it.
30. She'll watch Pawn Stars with me.
31. She sat and had a drink at Redneck Heaven with me.
32. She doesn't make me watch Desperate Housewives.
33. She doesn't get pissy when I want to buy a Star Wars t-shirt.
34. She's ok with dressing my daughter in Star Wars onesies.
35. She understands that football is of utmost importance.
36. She humors me when I say stuff like I want to build a bedroom in the shape of the Millennium Falcon.
37. She does a great job handling our social calendar.
38. She owns a gun.
39. She doesn't read Harry Potter or Twilight.
40. She puts Kenadie first above everything.
41. I get to manage the DVR.
42. She trusts me to watch the baby.
43. She doesn't complain when I go have guy time.
44. She was so easy to fall in love with.
45. She's smart as well as sexy.
46. She listens to me.
47. She taught me how to enjoy mac n cheese in various flavors.
48. She's frugal.
49. I trust her without question with our daughter.
50. How she makes our baby smile.
51. Seeing how good she is at changing diapers, as she may have to change mine in our later years.
52. She lets me change the radio station, so long as I don't tune to NPR.

Happy Valentine's Day everyone!

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day so I never have to live without you." - A. A. Milne

According to the CDC this blog will give your kid gas

As a new parent the number one concern of mine is the health of my daughter. When looking up information about the health and welfare of children one can and will be bombarded with all kinds of misinformation. No better example of this is the nonsense surrounding the supposed dangers of vaccines.

Since Dr Andrew Wakefield's discredited study, and the promotion of such fraudulent findings by the likes of Jenny McCarthy, parents have been misinformed about the side effects of vaccines from autism to ring around the collar. Parents often associate changes in their child when they've had a vaccine, from the flu to some neurological disorder. Now if we lived in a world where causation does prove correlation, they would have a point, but we don't, and their point is misguided at best. Does reading this blog make you sexy? I'd like to think so, but sadly genetics play more of a role in that than The Wilson Family. The fact that only sexy people read this blog doesn't prove anything.

The fact of the matter is is that vaccines have been instrumental in eliminating horrible diseases, such as polio and small pox. The anti-vaccine folks deny this with the zeal of a religious fundamentalist, and there's really no arguing with them as they don't care about things like facts. They want to believe that big Pharma is out to kill your children, and they can white knight their kids as only they think they can. It makes them feel important, and a better parent, if they have an evil to fight against, real or imagined.

If you read the intellectually vapid articles from homeopaths, naturopaths, and other quack websites, you'll be called a fool, or worse, for wanting to protect your children from debilitating diseases in the only way science knows for sure how. New on the list of anti-vaccine folk is the HPV vaccine.

A friend of mine posted an article by Catherine Stack on Facebook (which seems to be the biggest outlet for the advancement of quackery), in which she denounces the HPV vaccine. Let's analyze the nosense shall we?

First she claims that the Gardasil vaccine, which is designed to protect those from HPV, is only designed to protect against four strands of HPV. Why that's important I don't know, nor care. Then she goes on to make an interesting point that getting regular pap smears can help fight against HPV, which I can't argue with. Then she hops aboard the crazy train:

Now, lets look at the high percent of injected young girls who have had serious and even life-threatening side effects from the Gardisil vaccine. According to the Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System (medalerts.org), as of January 2010, there were more that 17,000 reports of adverse reactions to this vaccine and 59 deaths and 18 of these deaths were girls under 17. When you compare these numbers to women who are not vaccinated, it is absolutely safer to do nothing — just get your Pap smears!

First off, the Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System, VAERS, is co-sponsered by the FDA and CDC, which naturopaths, such as Ms. Stack, see as the evil empire. To use the data of the enemy to back her claim is dripping with dramatic irony, but it gets even weirder. A simple search of VAERS finds that it's only a public reporting system and nothing else. That means if I think my child got a case of the farts from a vaccine, I report it to VAERS and they would publish my own unscientific findings. Hardly the stuff of hard science, and even VAERS admits it. A simple reading of VAERS FAQs will tell you that in no way should the data indicate that serious complications from vaccines exist until further study is complete.

So the VAERS system is in no way an accurate record of the side effects of vaccines, but Ms. Stack oddly goes to treat it as such. She states that 59 deaths have been caused by Gardasil, but looking closer at the data reported to VAERS, none of the deaths (actually 71 reported in this case) demonstrated any link to any vaccine. In face, only 34 of these reported deaths could be confirmed at all, and of those 34 there was no indication that the death was caused by Gardasil, and some even indicated that their demise was from another cause.

Ms. Stack goes on to fraudulently use that data to indicate girls get neurological disorders from Gardasil, which yes, some people have reported this to VAERS, but again no evidence backs this claim up. Even with the reports given, there rates of Guillain-Barré Syndrome is no higher among vaccinated people than unvaccinated.

Now if you're an anti-vaccine person, or someone who likes to believe big pharma is out to poison your dog food, you'll probably say something like "oh you just believe everything the FDA tells you." This is something I've heard many times and every time it's an unfair characterization. I believe in analyzing evidence to making important decisions about my child's health. If the evidence is backs up what the FDA, or anyone for that matter, claims, I'll believe it, if it's not, it can and should be easily dismissed. In the case of Ms. Stack, one can safely assume she's misrepresenting data to further her anti-vaccine cause. Whether she did it out of incompetence or if it was deliberate remains to be seen. I'd like to think she's just uneducated rather than someone who willingly puts out misinformation that puts others at risk, but I like to look on the bright side of things.

Now is Gardasil safe? According to the authorities on the matter we have no reason to believe otherwise, but I think some will want Gardasil to be unsafe, so they can gallop on their high horses fighting a fight that's unnecessary and can cause the uneducated to risk harm to their children.

I'll let Ms Stack have the last word, which should be telling:

"Cancer and many other diseases are not established in your body from lack of a pill or vaccine. How you eat, live and think makes you either an open door to disease or an unlikely candidate." - Catherine Stack

I'm a child care provider

Hey folks, husband here with some interesting news about your fatherness. According to the current US Census Bureau a man watching their kids is a babysitter. No seriously. According to their report, Who's Minding the Kids?,which is none of their damn business, but whatever, the mother is the primary parent and when she watches the kids it's called motherhood. Since God never intended a person without ovaries to care for crotch fruit, the Bureau considers it a child care arrangement.

This is fascinating to me, as we are in 2012 and I thought we're all about progressing towards equality, but since I'm a child care provider, can I garnish my wife's wages when she works on Sundays and I'm at home with Kenadie? Can I write off expenses that I use to care for her during those days? Does the Census Bureau consider child rearing only women's work and men are just there to drink beer, watch TV, make messes, and fart repeatedly?

See I'm a progressive sort and I believe the children are our future, teach them well and let them lead the way...uhh...anyways why should anyone be considered the designated parent based on their gender is laughable, if not insulting. See in my household my wife sees me as her equal and trusts that I can take care of a child just as good as she can...you can stop laughing now.

Seriously, I wonder why the Census Bureau even needs to collect this data at all, or why they thought putting titles on a parent's gender was a good idea. What I don't understand is how this applies to gay couples. In the case of two men, are they both child care givers? Two women are both designated parents? Why can't they just call them parents and leave it at that?

“Regardless of how much families have changed over the last 50 years women are still primarily responsible for work in the home. We try to look at child care as more of a form of work support.” -Lynda Laughlin of the Census Bureau’s Fertility and Family Statistics Branch.

Is it worth it?

Sometimes when I talk in public or post about my daughter on my other blog or Facebook, I get that comment from the permanently childless person who feels it necessary to exclaim why they never want children. They vary from "I love being an uncle/aunt, but never want kids" or "Yeah, I love kids, but never want my own." I don't condemn those people as for many years I was that person, but I know what they really mean.

When someone says they don't want kids means they want to maintain the freedom to do things, which often times they never do. They say they want to travel, but never leave their state. They say they want to be able to date and sleep with anyone on a whim, when they usually just cry while they masturbate while Flogging Molly plays in the background. They want to bar hop till two in the morning, when they usually end up just staying home as their friends now have kids and don't have time or money to go out.

Now some have legitimate concerns, like they cynically look at the planet and think it's not a good environment for kids, which is something that's hard to argue, because it's subjective. Yet our parents decided to spawn children with the looming threat of nuclear annihilation hanging over them. Some say they can't afford kids, but that really means they don't want to give up their simple luxuries.

You know what? I'm ok with you not having kids. Whatever reason you don't want to slip out crotch fruit is a legitimate one. Really, it's cool. Don't spawn. The big difference between me of yesteryear and you is that I never felt the need to exclaim how dedicated I was to not reproducing when I was never asked my thoughts on the matter. Well maybe I have, but this is my blog and I'm going with the fact that I was the poster child of social graces. Yes parenting is hard, time and money consuming, and can cause stress between you and the person you decided to breed with, but those moments when you look down at your baby cradled in their mother's arms, and they look back at her with a smile, makes all the effort worth it.

So yeah, continue with your unsolicited lecturing masked as holier than thou preaching about how parents are throwing their life away. I've lead both lives, and I'm secure in my choices, as you should be.

"Every cliche about kids is true; they grow up so quickly, you blink and they're gone, and you have to spend the time with them now. But that's a joy." - Liam Neeson

A Few of My Favorite Things

Having a baby is hard work, but it is the most rewarding job I could ever have.  I love being a Mom and at times there are things that you can buy to make the job of being a Mom a little easier.  Here are some of my favorite things for baby that I couldn't live without:

1. Burp/Lap Pads-http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=4086285

-These are the best things ever! They are washable (going green) We use them for every diaper change.  Since Kenadie is sleeping in our room still at night we are pretty tired and change her diaper on our bed.  Thank goodness for these little soaker uppers, they have saved us numerous times for having to strip our bed and wash the sheets in the middle of the night because of an accident that Kenadie has while changing her diaper.  They soak up an entire bladder full and don't leak through to the other side.  Another use for these is under their sheets.  We use them under the pack n play sheets and the crib sheets where her head will lay so when she spits up it won't ruin the mattress or pack n play pad underneath.  LOVE THESE!

2. Bottle Warmer-http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2403663
-This is a life saver.  It beats having to wait for the water to boil to put the bottle in to heat up or microwaving the milk, ( which I hear is bad anyway).  This little beauty is wonderful.  I simply fill this little measuring device that it comes with to the desired amount of water for the amount of milk in ounces that I have and put it in the warmer and put the bottle in and it steams the bottle and the milk comes out at the perfect temperature every time!  It takes approx 2 mins for a 4 ounce bottle to heat up.  Life save for in the middle of the night when your baby is up screaming and hungry and you are barely functioning. 

3.  Tommee Tippee Bottles-http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3918819

-These Bottles are awesome.  They are said to be as close to a mother's nipple as possible.  Kenadie took to these with ease.  They also have an anti colic valve that allows babies to feed more comfortably with less air and vacuum build up.  They are easier to wash than Dr. Browns.  It serves the same purpose as those but you don't have as many parts to wash like Dr. Browns.  Great in saving time with the ginormous amounts of bottles to be washed on a daily basis.  The shape of the bottle will make it easier for her to hold as she gets older too. 

4. Target Brand Diaper Rash Ointment-http://www.target.com/p/up-up-Zinc-Diaper-Rash-Ointment-4-oz/-/A-11454279
-Kenadie has only had 1 case of diaper rash and it was due to Thrush.  This stuff works better than Bordeaux's Butt Paste, Desitin, A&D Ointment, you name it.  It has 40% Zinc Oxide vs the other's who have only 16%.  This stuff is a little more tough to wipe off, but for the bad case of diaper rash, this stuff really works. 

5. Colic Calm- http://www.cvs.com/CVSApp/search/search.jsp?searchTerm=colic+calm&QP=N%3D92%26Ntk%3DAll%26Nty%3D1%26Ne%3D14%26Ntx%3Dmode+matchallpartial%26Nr%3DOR%7B92%2COR%7B93%7D%2COR%7B90%7D%2COR%7B122%7D%7D%26searchType%3DsearchHome

-This stuff works.  I know there are people out there, my husband being one of them that don't believe in this stuff, being that it is classified as homeopathic.  I don't really have much of an opinion on that matter except that when Kenadie was going through a period of time where she was getting fussy just at night time around 6-7p.m.  Thankfully that has passed.  I wrote on facebook about her fussiness and a friend of mine told me to try Gripe Water or Colic Calm, that they really worked for her child.  I thought hey, if it will help I will try anything to not hear my precious angel cry and be upset.  I tried Mommy's Bliss Gripe Water first and it seemed to calm her down a little, but a few days later I went to CVS and picked up the Colic Calm.  It was a little bit more expensive ($20)  and this product is made with vegetable charcoal, so it is black in color and it will stain their clothes.  This works within 10-15 mins and Kenadie was calm and no longer upset. It must taste good too, she sucks it down right out of the syringe.  I thought it may be a fluke, so we tried it for a few nights and it hasn't failed us yet.  Also, this product claims to treat the hiccups.  It works well for this too.  Poor Kenadie hates the hiccups. CVS is the only place I have found it.  Walgreens and Walmart do not carry it.

6. Fisher Price Lullabys and Baby Einstein Lullaby CD's.  http://www.target.com

-Kenadie responds really well to music.  When she is upset, we put it on and it is the automatic soother.  I have tried these two CD's and they are great. 

7. Baby Einstein DVD's

-These are awesome.  At 6 weeks we started putting Kenadie in front of our living room TV in her swing and turned on the Baby Einstein DVD's.  She immediately was interested and started focusing in on it.  I think it is great for learning shapes, colors, animals etc. 

8. Skip Hop Pronto Changing Station-http://www.toysrus.com/product/index.jsp?productId=2756998

- This has come in handy so many times.  This is a little fold out changing station, so in those nasty public restrooms you don't have to put your baby on the dirty changing station provided where who knows what has been on it.  It wipes clean and has pockets for wipes and diaper rash ointment.  Great Buy!

9. Pampers Swaddlers Diapers- http://www.pampers.com/en_US/proddetail/id/900826

-I love these diapers, they keep her dry and they have the blue line indicator in sizes NB, 1 & 2 to let you know if they are wet.  We have tried the regular Pampers and they don't have the blue line. 

Since Kenadie is only 9 weeks this Friday, I have come across several things that I like.  These are just a few.  I am sure as time goes by and she gets older there will be several others that I will find and update everyone on them. 

I come close to destroying baby equipment

"Ohhh shit," I cried as I watched the stroller make it's unattended flight down my driveway. My heart skipped several beats before I bolted for it, but it ran into the street.

Let me back up. The wife and I were leaving the house with Kenadie, but as most parents are aware this is an ordeal worthy of an Orthodox ceremony. Careful detail is arranged each and every time, from checking the diaper bag 13 times to insure all items are present and accounted for, to making sure the baby is snug in their car seat. It's a painstaking process that must be undertaken each and every time, for the idea of leaving without something as simple as baby wipes seems a horrifying prospect.

This outing was no different than any other. I grabbed the stroller and the baby in her car seat and head into the garage without incident. I park the stroller next to the car, but thought against taking the time to set the brakes as I assumed the garage was level.

I put the baby in the back of the car and turn to see the stroller make it's way down my driveway. I guess the garage isn't as level as I once assumed. I cried out in terror, wondering if someone actually saw that and logically assumed a baby was occupying the stroller, and then reporting us to CPS. The stroller made it's way into the street with me running after it. It stopped on the curb on the other side and no damage was done thankfully, but it was horrifying none the less.


"Stroller: a wanderer; vagrant." - Dictionary.com

The business of lying

Shortly after the wife got pregnant I sat down to watch a documentary called "The Business of Being Born," a film designed to make you believe that hospital births are detrimental to the health and well being of women and children and home births are the best solution, all under the guise of "promoting choice." After I watched it I sat and pondered with the wife about where exactly we would be giving birth, and she quickly said she wanted to be at a hospital as it seems safer. This last sentence will make home birth advocate's blood vessel burst, but that's OK.

The movie was effective with it's propaganda, as it did make me question the logic of having a child in a hospital, however fleeting that moment was. It even goes into conspiracy theories about the medical industry, which was amusing at best, dishonest at worst. It reminded me of a Glenn Beck show, where he spews all kinds of mis-information, and when called on it he claims he's just asking questions, as if those inquiries aren't part of promoting a political agenda. Clever as they may be, it's still dishonest as it is disturbing.

Now home birth advocates have a lot in common with homeopaths in that their arguments for their use of medicine are almost exactly the same. Let's list a few shall we?

1. Big pharma is corrupt and would rather keep you sick than heal you, especially when they reject what I believe is sound science. - This argument is appalling to me, as they drag peoples' names through the mud for no reason other than to hock their reasoning. It's like they believe that there are a bunch of overweight men sitting in a room smoking cigars they light with 100 dollar bills thinking up ways to get rich while helping you die, and convince all medical practitioners to get in on it. Plus they have absolutely no evidence for any of this to exist.
2. I've done my research, and clearly my choice is the safest one. - This is bogus, especially in the case of home birth advocates, because as we now know, home birth deaths are clearly on the rise and the rates are higher than hospitals. And these numbers don't account for deaths that occur when patients transfer from the home to hospital. You've drawn what you believe is a logical conclusion well before you decided to research, and you've stubbornly refused to accept anything that points otherwise, data be damned.
3. OBGYNs just want to perform c-sections, and will force you into one. - Again with dragging peoples' names through the mud. It's as if they think doctor's are wringing their hands together forcing mothers to have major surgery so they could go play golf or something. This probably doesn't need to be stated, but no doctor can force anyone to do something. You are the customer and can refuse any treatment. Most doctors would not want to perform c-sections, as it's risky. My wife's OBGYN asked us to steer clear of c-sections, as she wasn't a fan of the procedure. Most are performed nowadays are because the women choose it, whether they want to save the aesthetics of their nethers or just have no interest in, or scared of, labor. But hey, you're all about choice right?
4. For most of history, humans didn't have hospitals and we survived as a species. - Yes, humans also didn't have vaccines against polio, or have the luxury of modern science, which has doubled our life expectancy. I mean if we really want to go all earthy and natural, why not cave births?
5. Europe has a lot of home births, and they have a lower infant mortality rate than the US. - While this is true, Europe, unlike the US, requires mid-wives and the like to a) complete almost as much education and training as an OBGYN and b) register with their respective governments and c) are normally required to continue their education. The US hasn't caught up with them, and in some states you don't have to register at all.
6. If something goes wrong, we can simply call an ambulance or transfer to a hospital on our own. - Sure you could, but why take that risk? In a medical emergency, seconds can mean the difference between life and death. Sure the odds are low that something fatal will occur, but shouldn't parents be most concerned with the safety of their child?
7. Home birthing is cheaper. - It certainly is, but like anything, you also get what you pay for.
8. I know many people who've chose home births and everything was fine. - Your anecdotes aren't data. Never have been, never will.
9. I want to experience the miracle of birth naturally. - You can do that in a hospital and if something goes wrong you can experience the miracle of modern medicine. Plus, before modern prenatal procedures, your chances at living were about 1:100, as opposed to now being 11:100000. Nature is not as it is portrayed in a Disney animated film, it can and will kill you whenever it gets the chance.

I mean no disrespect to people who choose home births, as the reasons they do may be numerous. Some are feeling the financial pinch of adding a new member to the family and feel this is an appropriate solution to that. It's the disinformation by advocates that I find appalling, especially when lives are at stake. There is no reason to believe that a home birth is any safer than a hospital one, plain and simple. While deaths in either scenario are unlikely, people who are having a difficult time choosing what is best for their situation shouldn't be lied to.

I sometimes think that parents automatically think they're right about everything when it comes to child rearing the minute they get pregnant, or they try to make you believe they do to cover up that fact that they're completely clueless. Believing that you're on the side of the good fighting the evils of big business and the FDA is empowering and has the effect of making you feel smarter than you really are. We could all humble ourselves and accept a healthy dose of skepticism even, and especially, when it comes to our own beliefs.

"And while journalists interviewed midwives and obstetricians, not a single one thought to interview a pediatrician or a neonatologist to determine whether the people who actually care for babies think about the dangers of homebirth to babies." - Dr. Amy Tuteur, The Skeptical OB

Cry It Out?

As Kenadie is almost 2 months old, we have read that this is the time that their little brains are growing so fast that they are beginning to start developing  sleep habits.  We are afraid that Kenadie has already started with some that are not positive.  She doesn’t like to be put down to sleep.  She wants to be held all the time.  As much as I would love to hold her and keep her a baby forever, I know that she needs to develop healthy sleep habits and Erik and I would like some sound slumber as well.  I know there are several parents who think that co sleeping is ok.  We have resulted to doing that only a few times for just an hour or so if she wouldn’t settle down.  Not to mention it is dangerous in my opinion with as sleep deprived as we both are and I fear blankets getting too close to her face.  I don’t think that is a good idea and I never get sound sleep when I have had to do that.  The other method that people talk about is the “Cry It Out” method.  This was developed by a pediatrician, Dr. Richard Ferber. This is a very controversial topic. I have learned that people look down on you if you so choose to try this method, just like it is the same if you don’t breastfeed. I also read a study that letting your infant cry for long periods of time can make them loose brain cells and that is not a good thing for their fast growing brains. Erik and I really don’t want to try the “Cry It Out” method unless that is the LAST resort. I can’t stand to hear her cry longer than a few minutes. It breaks my heart, so I am hoping that it doesn’t come down to that. Last night we tried soothing her for a couple of minutes until her eye lids started getting heavy and then put her down. She would then, do the typical Kenadie thing and immediately wake up and be ready to play. She stayed like that for a while and then she would get fussy and we would give her the “paci” and comfort her and then put her back down to try and learn to soothe herself. She was happy and content for the most part and finally fell asleep after about an hour by herself without having to be rocked or held to go to sleep! HALLELUJAH, let’s hope that this isn’t a fluke and that this easy and wonderful behavior will continue. I like this sleep method! Happy Baby = Happy Parents.

The dreaded day

Sunday, January 29, 2012 is a sad day for me as a new mother. This is the day that I have dreaded since giving birth 7 weeks ago. The day that I go back to work and have to leave my little angel for the first time. Over the past week, I have cried and mentally prepared myself for this day. I knew it wouldn’t be easy, but it was harder than I ever thought it would be. As a mom, my biggest fear is that Kenadie will feel like I have left her or don’t care about her, when that in fact is farthest from the truth. I want her to always know that I am here for her and ALWAYS will be and will never stop loving her for as long as I live. I just want to be the perfect mom, which I know is impossible, no one is perfect and I will screw up and hopefully learn from my mistakes. I want to be the parent who raises my children, but in this world with the cost of living just increasing, I have to work and rely on “It takes a Village” to help raise my child. The good news is that I am truly blessed with a wonderful family. Kenadie will spend time with Erik and my mother on the days that I have to work. Who better could I ever ask for, her father and grandmother. There is no doubt that she will be in the best hands possible, people that love her more than life itself. Last night, I got everything packed up and ready for the next day. I went to bed at 8:30p.m. and Erik was wonderful and stayed up with Kenadie to feed her and to put her to sleep for me while I got some much needed sleep. Kenadie finally went down around 11p.m. and slept until 3:45a.m. My alarm was set to go off at 4:15a.m. it worked out perfectly. I fed her and got ready for work and was ready to head out the door @ 5:15a.m. This was the time that I was trying to prepare myself for. The first time to leave my baby. I shed a couple of tears as I held her tight and hugged and kissed her. I handed her over to Erik and told her to be a good girl and enjoy having Daddy time today. It was hard, very hard, but I managed to keep quite calm. The best thing was knowing that she was safe in Daddy’s arms and that he would NEVER let anything happen to her under his care, so I was able to go to work knowing that she would be ok. Now, I just can’t wait for the 10 hour day to go by as fast as possible so I can see my Kenadie. The best thing is as I am typing this, Erik surprised me and brought Kenadie up here to see me. I have the best husband ever!

Slumber, it's not for parents anymore.

Hey folks, husband here with some tales for those who have yet to experience having a child.

When my wife was pregnant I started to feel some sleep deprivation. She was up frequently with runs to the bathroom, some food cravings, or feeling the aches and pains of carrying a child in her stomach. I would often wake, if only for a few seconds, then back into slumber I went. I would arise in the morning feeling less than well rested, but still useful to varying degrees.

Given all that went on with sleep in the third trimester I assumed that it would prepare me for the massive sleep deprivation that would ensue when having an infant in the home. I was never more wrong in my entire life.

Parents warned me about how I would never sleep after Kenadie was born, but I would shrug such doomsday predictions off, thinking I could handle it swimmingly. Arrogance got the better of me when the sudden realization that a full eight hours of sleep would be months, if not years, away.

The wife and I scrambled to find a solution to Kenadie not wanting to allow us some sleep. We tried everything from night time rituals, music, and various products with questionable evidence if they actually work. After about a month we came to the horrific realization that we were at the mercy of our infant, and she would sleep on her own schedule, and there's was little to nothing we could do about it.

People have attempted to give us advice on what to do when a baby decides to be a night owl, but I seriously wonder if they actually had any success, or if they were just trying to make us think they were the best parents since the Nelsons. It's humbling to think that you can't outsmart a person who has the memory span of maybe twenty four hours, but such is parenting.

My baby loves some attention, as some nights I can rock her gently to sleep pretty easily, but the second I put her down she's as wired as a meth addict and as cranky as Ted Nugent at a vegan restaurant. She's my daughter and I'm happy to give her any and all attention needed, but I sometimes wonder what this lack of sleep is doing to my brain. The moment when feeding time arises I wake up and break to the kitchen to make a bottle, but if my wife requests something else I forget half the time what it was she wanted by the time I exit the bedroom. I sometimes wonder if I'll end up leaving the house without pants if this continues.

"A man is not complete until he has seen the baby he has made." - Sammy Davis, Jr.

The most amazing day of our lives, husband edition, part 2

Hey folks, husband here with part 2 of chronicling the event of our daughters birth. I got to hold Kenadie in my arms for a bit, but as I looked over at the wife I could feel a twinge of jealousy from her. Not in any mean sense, but she was ready to have the baby in her arms after carrying her in her belly for nine months. I handed the baby to her and watched her enjoy her mom time.

After a bit I walked to the family waiting room and announced we had a healthy baby girl, wiping away the tears I had from earlier. Yes, me, the pinnacle of masculinity cried a bit as I watched my daughter enter the world. The family took note and came with me to the room to see their new relative for the first time.

The baby was passed around more times than a case of herpes in high school. Everyone got their infant fix and happiness filled the room. After much celebration the family decided to go home and get some much needed rest. The nurses took us to the nursing station and had Kelly press a button. The hospital PA echoed with a lullaby. They do that every time a baby is born.

We were escorted to our post-partum room and they took Kenadie to the nursery. Some time passed and I went to watch my daughter's first bath. The nurse opened my child's diaper, and before me I saw the messiest diaper in the history of Pampers. The nurse used what seemed like a hundred wipes, and I was about to recommend a pressure washer.

The way the nurse handled my infant was amazing as she didn't seem to be that gentle, but I had to remind myself that baby's bones are basically rubber and they're a resilient lot. I didn't punch the lady, but it still made my nerves rattle a bit.

After the bath the nurse stated she would swing by with the wee one when feeding time commenced. I made my way back to my room to see my wife sitting on the floor with the nurses yelling her name. She came to, but then collapsed again. The nurses gave her smelling salts and I panicked a bit. The fact that she was up for over 24 hours with no food exhausted her to the point of passing right out. She was fine though as the nurses helped her into her bed and she got some much needed rest.

I sat down in my recliner, fired up the computer, and gave the online world an update on the baby. Soon the nurse brought in Kenadie for a feeding, and after Kelly was done I decided to try my hand at changing a diaper. I've done it before, but when it's your own kid you try to be as thorough as possible, which resulted in my trying to use the force and hover her over the dirty diaper as I clean her. My jedi skills were lacking though.

I got to hold Kenadie in my arms for a bit and we sat down and watched "Annie" together, which was far more fun that it sounds. It was my first time really bonding with my child over casual activity, and I imagined myself taking her to plays and such and watching her light up over musical theatre.

The nurses then came and took her again and I tried to sleep, which was futile as two hours later we were awoke again for another feeding. This went on all day, as visitors came and went, food being delivered, and many runs to get crackers and soda for the wife ensued, all ensuring slumber was elusive.

The following day the wife and I were set to go home, away from the security of trained professionals and take full responsibility for the care of our child. I packed up the car and a nurse stated that they were worried about me as they noticed me walking around the hospital looking like death. Nothing says sleep deprivation as being in a hospital.

We load the baby into my wife's car and head home. We take her into the house and set her down and take a look at our little loved one. After a nice moment wore off the wife and I looked at each other and said "now what?"

"A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again." - Enid Bagnold

The most amazing day of our lives, husband edition.

Hey folks, husband here with a different, but in many ways the same perspective on the birth of our child. As the wife indicated in the previous post, she was going to a regularly scheduled doctor's appointment with my mother in-law and I was to stay at home and work. The girls planned on having lunch afterwards and I was looking forward to the possibility of them bringing me something to eat.

I was on a conference call for a meeting I was running and my phone rang. It was my mother in-law, but being busy I sent it to voice mail. Then a text arrived from the wife stating that her water broke and it was time for childbirth.

"Jumping Jesus," I cried out. "I'm going to be a daddy. I gotta go." The others on the call ordered me to hang up on them and get my ass to the hospital. This was around 11 am.

I called my wife and she sounded happier than I've ever heard her before. She asked that I grab some last minute items and hurry over to the hospital. I took a quick shower, got dressed, scrambled around the house, double and triple checking that I had everything, loaded it into my wife's car, and drove like I was part of the Andretti family to the Centennial Medical Center.

I arrived and gathered belongings and made my way to my wife's room. She was sitting up with a pleasant look and seemed excited about the upcoming event. I take note of the environment we were in, and made sure I was aware of the surroundings. I made a mental image of where everything was going to happen and tried to prepare myself for my first child.

Hours go by and visitors came and went. Finally after much discussion, the wife decided an epidural was in order. The anesthesiologist appeared and discussed the process with alarming detail. We were told all that could go right and wrong, and even got a little chemistry lesson. He urged me not to look at her back while he's injecting the needle, as he assumed I would pass out. He told me how many fathers go limp when they see a syringe the size of a javelin in her spine. I took his advice as he repeated the warning multiple times.

The wife hunched over and the doctor did his thing. Sadly the needle went too far into her spine, so the labor pains were gone, but she got a terrible headache and had some back spasms. It was so bad the nurse had to come into the room every half hour or so to turn her to a more comfortable position.

The hours went by and I realized this will go well into the night, if not the early morning. Family started to arrive and I prepared them that if they stay there will be no sleep for anyone involved, which turned out to be true. The wife's headaches and back spasms got worse and we were moving her with more frequency.

I did little errands such as grabbing ice and popsicles, the only nourishment she was allowed, as I drank enough coffee that would normally kill a horse. The wife, her friend, my sister in-law, and my mother in-law all speculated on her dilation and kept trying to guess when exactly the baby would arrive. This discussion went on for what seemed like forever, until the nurse finally came in and checked the wife. She wasn't near ready just yet.

A few hours roll by and more discussion between the ladies ensued about my wife's cervix. The wife was still uncomfortable do to her epidural side effects, but thankfully the nurse checked her again and decided it was time to have a baby.

Now during the childbirth class the instructor informed the men how the days of pacing and chain smoking in a waiting room while the wife gives birth are over and that we'll be required to be a coach to our better halves during the process. In my mind I pictured me holding the wife's hand and giving breathing cues, just like in the movies, but nothing could be further from reality.

Two nurses came in and kicked out everyone but my mother in-law and myself. They prepared for the pushing and ordered my in-law and I to grab one of my wife's legs and push it up against her, which proved to be a nice little workout. The nurses monitored her contractions, told her to push, told us to start pushing her legs and coax her into pushing harder, wash, rinse, repeat.

One of the nurses decided it would be a great idea to start a tug of war. She grabbed a bed sheet and tied a knot in each end and threw one to the wife while the nurse grabbed the other. A contraction hit and they tugged for a bit, then the nurse stated she was too old to be doing this and threw her end of the sheet to me.

Ye gods I was to be tugging on this? I'm stronger than my wife, so I imagined my wife letting go and sending me flying into medical equipment behind me with scalpels and what not being lodged into my throat, but thankfully this did not transpire.

This was the first time I was about to see my daughter's exit point. Now I was always worried how I would react to see my wife's nethers being stretched to the point that may seem almost inhuman. Would I pass out? Would I run out of the room screaming gibberish and pouring liquid soap into my eyes?

Actually it wasn't bad at all. I knew what to expect and knowing that I was about to see my daughter for the first time really made every aspect of this experience wonderful. As I was informed earlier, the technology behind child birth really hasn't changed in forty years, so everything was going normally. That being said my nerves really started to get the better of me, and this is where my wife and I differ. A mother only worries about the safety and health of her child during birth, whereas a father worries about both the mother and baby. The terror of the small possibility of losing them both was starting to rattle me, even though the probability was slim to none, it still made me want to steal some medical morphine and inject it under my tongue.

Finally we could see the top of my daughter's head. The nurses called the doctor at the unholy hour of 3:30 am. We waited for the doctor to arrive and I sat there wondering how my baby's head was doing. The OBGYN finally came into the room and prepared for the delivery. The wife pushed a bit more and the doctor turned my daughters head and pulled her out.

It was then my nerves peaked. My daughter's not saying anything. Is that normal? What the hell was she doing to my baby girl? Should she twist her head like that? Do I have to punch someone? Finally Kenadie took her first breath and cried her first cry. A rush of adrenaline went through me and I felt higher than Keith Richards ever could attain.

Kenadie wasn't exactly camera ready at that point, as she was covered in dark liquids and looked all alien like. They placed her on my wife's belly and cleaned her up, then took her and cleaned her some more and checked vitals and what not.

The adrenaline finally wore off and I got to take in all that was happening with a somewhat sound mind. My baby was finally here after so much waiting. She was healthy and beautiful. My wife was happier than she'd ever been in her life. The nurses handed my little girl to me and I got to hold her for the first time. I looked at my wife and realized how lucky a man I am. I've never been more proud of her.

I looked down at my little baby and saw some traits that she got from me, which was surreal, but amazing at the same time. She was now our little baby, and we're no responsible for her health and welfare.

To be continued....

"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other hand, we can open all our own jars." - Bruce Willis

The most amazing day of our lives!

December 9, 2011 was the most amazing day of my life! 

The last trimester was pretty rough for me as I was extremely tired, had horrible heartburn, could barely breathe and it took so much energy to roll over in bed it was exhausting. I was counting down the days until I could deliver my sweet angel into this world, so I could have my body back and get out of bed with more ease.  I loved being pregnant don't get me wrong, but by the end, I was wanting to get her here already.  I had no patience, what is new right?  haha  It all started Thurs December 8th at a routine doctors appointment @ 10:00a.m. I was 38 weeks pregnant.  My mother wanted to go with me since we were going to go eat lunch and have a girls day after the appointment.  We were anxious to see if I had progressed more and to see if we were one step closer to meeting our little one. I remember saying that it would be nice if the doctor just sent us to Labor and Delivery after the appointment to get the party started, while I knew that wouldn't happen, it was still nice to dream since I was so uncomfortable.  While mom and I went to the doctors appointment, Erik was working from home and was in the middle of conference calls.

I went in the exam room to see Dr. Elliott and she did her exam and accidentally broke my water!  O... M...G...  It took me a couple of seconds to realize what had happened and that I hadn't just peed on myself.  Thank goodness, that would have been mildly uncomfortable and embarrassing.  I was so excited, I looked at my mom and said, " My, my water just broke, we are going to have a baby!"  I couldn't wait to call Erik and let him know that he was about to be a daddy!  I called Erik and he didn't answer since he was in meetings, so I text him and told him that my water broke and he was going to be a daddy and to come to the hospital right away.  He later told me that he interrupted the meeting by saying, " Jumping Jesus, I am going to be a dad, I gotta go!"  Erik scrambled to get the last minute belongings and rushed to the hospital to meet his little girl. 

They took me to Labor and Delivery and got me all hooked up to IV's and such.  After a couple of hours, I decided that an epidural was in order and asked to meet my best friend and hero, the anesthesiologist.  They sent him in and he took his sweet time administering the epidural, he ended up going too far and hit spinal fluid and that resulted in a spinal headache and back and neck spasms.  The labor pains were gone, but the epidural issues were horrible.  This resulted in the nurse having to turn me over every 30 mins, since I couldn't feel ANYTHING and couldn't move.  My poor nurse..  After 17 1/2 hours of labor, it was the wee hours of the morning on December 9, 201. They called Dr. Elliott at home and she came up to the hospital to safely bring our precious bundle into this world healthy and happy.  We were all exhausted, but were on a high like we have never experienced in our life. We are totally in love,  we were parents!  I can't believe I am a Mommy and Erik is a Daddy. The most amazing title and job we will ever have. What a special blessing from God! I hear people say it, but now I know it is so true.  I never thought I could love something so much!  Thank you to all our family and friends that were there at the hospital that night to meet little Kenadie and welcome her to this world with open arms.  I will never forget it!  God is truly Amazing..

Kenadie Fae Wilson
December 9, 2011 3:59 a.m. cst
6 lbs 15 oz 19 3/4 inches long

The last leg..

Hey folks, Husband here with tales of child rearing from a male point of view. As most of you are aware the wife and I were pregnant and gave birth to a healthy baby girl, but there's so much to tell about the trials and triumphs of pregnancy to childbirth. While pregnancy was no picnic, I shall chronicle the things I miss about it:

1. Sleep: The third trimester was kind of a chore when it came to sleeping sound as the wife was up multiple times relieving herself, but I could get a full eight hours of sleep, where now I'm lucky to get four.
2. Eating whatever the hell you want: When you have a pregnant wife you must get her the food she's craving if you're interested in peace. That gives you an excuse to eat till your heart's content, because no woman wants to see their man consume a low calorie salad while they eat waffles covered in bacon syrup.
3. Watching your wife enjoy a fine meal: When you have a pregnant wife, watching her eat the food she's craving is akin to seeing a child open their Christmas presents. Rarely will she look more happy.
4. Playing video games/reading/watching moves the wife hates: When the wife was pregnant, she would like to sleep as much as humanly possible. This left me with all kinds of time to play some games, read books, and/or watch films she has no interest in seeing. Now that I have a baby my first priority is to get sleep whenever possible, hobbies and entertainment be damned.
5. The ability to leave the house in a timely fashion: When the wife was pregnant, going somewhere wasn't much of a chore. Now that we're parents we have to double and triple check each and every item we will be bringing with us, because leaving an important item at home could prove disastrous.
6. Working from home: Before when I worked from home and was on a conference call, the only interruptions I really had to worry about were my dogs. Now I have a baby crying whenever she wants something, on top of dogs who choose to bark at their own shadows.

"I am not finding pregnancy much of a joy. I am afraid of childbirth, but I am afraid I can't find a way of avoiding it." - Brigitte Bardot